And They Want To Be In Charge of Our Health Care?!?!?!
69The Complete and Utter Stupidity at the DMV
I remarried back in June of 2010. On December 30th, I took a day off from the office to take my new bride, Beth, to the DMV so she could change the name on her license to her new one. The process seemed easy enough. Take a number. Fill out the right form. Then wait to be called to the counter.
Upon our arrival, we began step one in what would quickly become a practice in complete and utter stupidity. We stood in line so that we could be assigned a number and given the appropriate form. Seemed simple enough except there was only one line from which to get this number and form while there were two other counters available to do this while other employees stood around with their right thumb stuck in a particular body orifice. This one line was manned by one woman. She appeared to be older than God's big brother and, if she was going any slower, she would have been going backwards on rewind. This process was hampered even further due to the fact most of the people in line could speak very little if any English. There were six people in line before us and it took 30 minutes for us to get to talk to the Diva of the DMV.
When we were summoned from the head of the line to be granted our audience with the DMV Diva and she spoke, I quickly noticed her deep baritone voice and nicotine-stained fingers as well as the fact she obviously hated either her job or me. Since we'd only just met, I quickly deduced that it was her job that was on the top of her hate list, not I. We were given a number and the appropriate form then told to take a seat, fill out the form, then come forward when our number was called. We found a pair of seats and Beth filled out the form. This took all of five minutes while I began looking and listening to the people surrounding us. I quickly realized the only thing missing were cages made of twigs and twine housing chickens and pot belly pigs on rope leashes. I suddenly had this almost uncontrollable desire to don a brown fedora and leather jacket before I ventured down the ramp to the counter once Beth's number was called. Maybe I should also watch for the huge round boulder sure to chase us down that ramp.
After an hour and forty-five minutes of wondering what the hell that smell was, Beth's number was called. We'd been summoned by one of the DMV Diva's assistants. I, of course, let Beth go first lest she rather than I be the one to catch a bullet or a poison-tipped blowgun dart in the back during our exit from a bad B-movie Hollywood scene.
We found the desk we'd been called to. Beth presented her old license, the appropriate form, and our marriage certificate. The long-awaited process was finally beginning. This woman was in a better mood than the DMV Diva at the front counter but not by much. She began typing and making copies of all Beth's forms then suddenly stopped. She needed Beth's birth certificate due to the fact her maiden name appeared on her old license. She didn't have her birth certificate but she did have her Social Security Card with her maiden name on it. That wouldn't do. The woman had to have Beth's birth certificate. I shuck my head in disgust. Beth stopped me from asking just how many of the non-English speaking applicants in the waiting room managed to bring their birth certificates over our southern border. Then to her credit, she turned and said she didn't have it with her but neither did Obama when last asked for his. We left unfortunately without the license doing something we hadn't done in a couple of hours. We were laughing at the look of the DMV Diva's old, wrinkled face. It was constricted tighter than Pelosi's last face lift.
The scariest part of our trip into the utter stupidity of the DMV is that these are the same bureaucrats that want to manage our health care. The upside is, if I have a sinus infection, I won't have to smell the horrible things I smelled while sitting in the DMV waiting room.
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I'm glad you liked it, Mr. Starr. Unfortunately, it is true.
Your comments on the leaks is right on the money as well.
There's nothing more private than our medical records, but now, a low-life Obamacare "Diva" will have full access to your colonoscopy pics and your last yeast infection treatment.
And God help you if you contract an STD!
The low-life Obamacare Diva will mistake a colonoscopy for her family portrait.
Hopefully our new House will defund this horrible legistlation then we can work on repealing it with a new, American president.
All these laws and regulation are hurting us more than helping.
Keep on hubbing!
I didn't understand if you got the license change or not.
eovery, thanks for the comments and, yes, all these laws and regulations are hurting us.
OpinionDuck, no, we didn't get the license. We have to go back at a later time with the birth certificate. Perhaps by then, we'll have seen Obama's birth certificate but I doubt it.
OpinionDuck, thanks for the heads up and I've edited accordingly.
Lol... sounds like a fairly precise account of every DMV visit in every state I've ever been to.
Right after we moved back to Iowa, I got pulled over and still had my AZ license, so the cop "reminded" me I only have 10 days to get it changed.
Got to the DMV, repeated your above outlined experience, (also needed my birth certificate) just to be told I also had to have a utility bill with my new address that was at least 30 days old.
Now... wait a minute... am I missing something? I only have 10 days to change over my license, but I'm not allowed to change my license until I've been a resident long enough to recieve a utility bill going back 30 days?
Suffice it to say, that was 2 years ago, never went back, still have my AZ license (which doesn't expire until 2044, by the way) and it all worked out dandy, as we're back in AZ now, anyways. Screw 'em.
shynsly, sounds like the same logic we have here in Tennessee. Thanks for the comments and the heads up we'll be sure to take along something with Beth's name and our new address on it.
However, the health care bill doesn't enact government run health care, so the entire argument is absurd. The Obama plan used market principles and the physical market in order to make strides in a serious issue. Your DMV story sucks, but it doesn't apply in the slightest.
I've approved Beta's comments to show just how anal-retentive his guy really is. He's obviously devoid of any sense of humor whatsoever. I call him Beta because he's obviously not a true Texan. The Texans I know are rugged individualists who don't need nor want a government to take care of them. It's for this reason I truly believe he's not a real Texan.
Beta, opinions are like a-holes. Everyone has one. I take comfort in knowing your unhappiness will only grow in 2011. Much to your exasperation and aggravation, the new House is going to defund Obamacare at the very least. We'll then work on repealing it after we get a REAL president in the White House, someone who believes and adheres to the Constitution.
You've shown yourself to be something of a jerk to more than a few here on HubPages. I have no doubt that will continue as some people don't have the ability to change for the better.
Ha! That's pretty much exactly what I thought when he seemed to take issue with my communism hub, lol... doesn't sound like any Texan I've ever met?
Godd old Beta up there. What a blind and utterly senseless man he is; I have had the great misfortune of him visiting some of my hubs as well. Humorless is as good an adjective as any for him.
I enjoyed your story, but it is deeply saddening that this is EXACTLY how our gov operates on ALL levels, plodding, angrily, and wastefully. I hope you can get this handled without taking time off of work, some of us have to pay for the welfare benefits for the do-nothings and illegals!!
shynsly and Sheri,
I was simply trying to put a little humor on what was really a very stupid situation at the DMV. As for Beta, he's the typical Liberal. He sees humor in nothing, especially those things that go against his Socialist beliefs. I feel pity for him really. He seems to be a very unhappy person trapped in a country that's becoming more and more conservative every day and it's killing him. Perhaps professional help and a daily pill would help him with the depression he's slipping into and prevent him curling into a fetal position in a corner crying for Michelle Obama. Either that or a plane ticket to a warm, Socialist country. One way, of course.
Thanks for your comments.
That might be the first time in my life I was told I was void of a sense of humor, but in context, I can dig it. I am not overly playful on here. SO, to the issue. Your response: get a sense of humor, you suck, you're not a real Texan. Yada-yada. We get that you can play in a sandbox, but now to the issues. I wrote this because the hub says that "they", being the government, want to run your health care. Obamacare, as you enjoy calling it, isn't government taking over your health care. So, I am not being of ill-humor, I am stating that you are incorrect in your basic assertion. I can gladly explain why Obamacare actually uses "free market principles" to solve or at least attempt to solve the problem we as a nation face in our health care crisis.
That other dude who wrote about his communism hub and how I did the same thing is correct. When you call something communist, but isn't anywhere close to the definition of communist, then it isn't communist. Period. There are definitions to these words and phrases that you people like using, and being held accountable to the dictionary appears to annoy you. Well...bummer.
Call it what you want, Beta. Whether it's Obamacare or using "free market principles." It doesn't matter what we label it, it's never a good thing when our government is involved and I don't care what you say, they are trying to take over our health care. Some of us see it for what it is and others simply can't or won't.
My point in this hub was, with the complete and utter stupidity demonstrated to me by the DMV, I want the government involved in my life as little as possible no matter what party is in the majority or the White House.
As for your sense of humor, we'd all like to see it some time. It's the only way we'll know if it exists. Most of the time your points are valid but they're lost in, to put it bluntly, your smart ass attitude. It's your presentation that, as you put it, sucks. Lighten up, bud. Life's too short.
Couldn't agree more, Hunter. And as to my "definitions" of communism being wrong:
Quote from Wikipedia:
"Bernard "Bernie" Sanders (born September 8, 1941) is the junior United States Senator from Vermont, elected on November 7, 2006. Before becoming Senator, Sanders represented Vermont's at-large district in the United States House of Representatives for 16 years. Sanders also served as mayor of Burlington, Vermont from 1981 through 1989.
Sanders is a self-described democratic socialist,[1][2] and has praised European social democracy. He is the first person elected to the U.S. Senate to identify as a SOCIALIST.[3] Sanders caucuses with the Democratic Party and is counted as a Democrat for the purposes of committee assignments."
Quote from wordnetweb.princeton.edu
"Definitions of COMMUNISM: a form of SOCIALISM that abolishes private ownership.
a political theory favoring collectivism in a classless society."
So, like I said, communism, socialism, marx...eh... "ism"... all the same animal. And many on the "Left" aren't even bothering to deny their affiliation with it anymore. Not that they can, when you look at the laws and regulations they keep pushing.
Sorry, don't mean to hijack your comments section... just wanted to clear that up.
shynsly, no apology necessary. Your hub was mentioned and insulted here so I would expect nothing less than for you to comment accordingly.
Thanks for the comment.
These are the sort of people who retire from the government with a healthy monthly stipend and then start their own consulting business teaching folks their expertise in customer service. You might as well laugh or you will simply cry for the lack of any leadership in these organizations. This is what happens when socialism takes over, all our jobs are guaranteed by the union, and we all share the pie equally....looks good huh! LOL! WB
Yeah man, I do get prickish on here for sure. This is where I go to vent if that makes sense. Like most of you, I am obsessed with politics and current events, but that passion needs venting. I am an ex frat boy guys...loads of fun. Get out the beers and we'll calm things down.
LongHunter
You would think that your marriage license would have the same requirement.
As for Obama, how do you give someone the highest level of security clearance and the big RED BUTTON without checking out his citizenship.
And if they already did check it out, then give the people the evidence.
good luck
To be fair, the DMV in Arizona does seem to be the exception to the "rule", at least here in Sierra Vista. I have to admit, I've been pretty impressed when I've had to go. It's a big modern facility with many windows, and they always seem to have adequate staff so the lines aren't too long.
On top of that, your license is issued long-term (mine LITERALLY doesn't expire until 2044, and I got it 5 years ago) so even if it was terrible service, at least most people would only have to deal with it a couple times in their lifetime.
Great hub, Longhunter, though I bet you didn't expect such a "controversy" to errupt over such a benign statement, lol. Voted up.
Shynsly,
Hey, it's Beta. What can you say. Thanks for the comments.
I do wish we had that kind of system here. If mine expired in 2044, I'd be 80. Unfortunately, ours expire every 4 years.
OpinionDuck,
We had both our birth certificates when getting our marriage license. It was also the same day I closed on our house and we got married a week later. Then we finished moving in the day after we got back from our honeymoon. Unfortunately, the certificates are still packed away in one of forty-five boxes that we're still unpacking.
Beta, "I am an ex frat boy guys...loads of fun" is a good excuse if you're still in college. I use to have a terrible temper, blaming it on my Scotch-Irish heritage until a lawyer told me my heritage wasn't a defense in court. He looked me dead in the eye and said, "Grow up." It clicked and I did.
Thanks for the comment.
OpinionDuck, I meant to add thanks for the comments.
You've missed the point of my statement. You claimed I had no sense of humor. I, in jest, said I do, mentioned I was an ex frat guy, and joked to bring out the beers to show you. I wasn't stating I am prickish because I was an ex frat guy, because that doesn't make sense. Humor dude. Do I need to tell you to loosen up now?
I didn't miss your point at all. My point was you can use those excuses just so long (ie. my excuse for my bad temper).
Yeah...now I am lost.
Maybe it's time to stop making excuses for being 'prickish' as you put it.
You seem like an intelligent, educated, well-informed person but that's all lost in your presentation when you start insulting people. You might be all of the above-mentioned things but you're not always right. No, neither am I. Difference is I go into a conversation with that realization and a willingness to admit it if I'm not.
Long and short: Government instigated compliance / regulation and litigious fees / oversight are causing companies to manage from a litigious stance. As many of you probably know, this type of management kills Quality within all processes. God, please bless this amazing country we live in and mute / disable our politicians from approving anymore regulation....I want my free economy health insurance, food items, cars, etc back and most of all, I want my free country back. As for Texas....yep, never heard of a Texan looking for more government.....Just saying.
Well said, Brutus. Thanks for the comments.
Probably your sense of humor saved you from going bananas at the DMV.
mslizzee, the ladies could tell I was not happy but I was able to keep my temper in check as we still have to get my wife's new driver's license. We will, however, be going to a different place to do it.
Thanks for the comment.
I have to admit you are right about the DMV. After a visit it is hard to believe their still so many drivers. Maybe they don't all have a license. Good hub!
Enjoyed the HUB, at least you could wrap up the bureaucratic stupidity in a little humor. My wife had a license for thirty years starting when they typed them on a typewriter up to the modern "tamper-proof" photo variety of today. She let it lapse for a couple years due to health reasons. When she went back to renew, she had to come up with the same "proof of existence" documentation. The sad thing is that the bureaucrats are so stupid they can't even see it. We're all doomed to this. (Up and funny!)
Great Hub! made me laugh out loud - can't wait to read some more of your stuff. Voted Up and Funny of course.
Wow, I'm really behind on this one.
Thanks for the comments, GNelson and grayghost.
I'm glad you got a good laugh, Conservative Lady. I had to laugh at the situation to keep from loosing my temper, something I rarely do anymore.
Thanks for the comments.
WillStarr Level 8 Commenter 16 months ago
Funny stuff because it's so true!
And if we can't even keep our diplomatic and military secrets out of the hands of a piss-ant outfit like Wikileaks, what makes us think our Obamacare medical records will be safe?
Whoa!